waking up to go into work was a dread. not a bore, but a feeling of dread and fear. maybe it was the fact that she was doing another bdsm scene and her fear of those grew in the past weeks. doing these for 4 weeks, she was only supposed to do one bdsm production. one. one singular production. not several scenes, just maybe a couple for this. 4 weeks now, though, she was rehearsing for a second film and it was draining her. coming home hurt, bruised. not even in any fun manner she wouldn't mind, she had scabs going over on open wounds. coming home to treat her wounds and a sprained wrist. her stomach couldn't handle the thought of going back in. she would never tell on them, though. she's heard of female actresses being threatened with every inch of their very being for putting a studio or even it's actors in a rut. suck it up, millie. you're always amazing at just grinning it off. you always pull off a nice smile, smiling helps.

putting on her make up in the mirror, her brace on her wrist and she did as much as she could to cover up the black eye she had got from the male actor that previous day. it was an accident, had to be. nobody hits amelia connelly. or so she thought, but she wasn't in that state of mind. maybe she deserved it if it was a purposeful act. dabbing on the make up, tears falling down her cheek. she needed to get out of this place. move far from california, she needed to do her own thing. wiping off her face and evening her foundation, tightening her brace and trying to stomach it all.

the only thing keeping her was the nomad patch with his motorcycle club. alex graves. he didn't mind her doing porn, but he hit her sometimes too, so none of this was a new concept for her. she knew when alex hit her, she was in the wrong or at least, so she thought. always thought it was her fault. grabbing her by the hair and slamming her down to the ground, screaming at her. she wasn't even his old lady, so she took it. she couldn't tell the club president about it. broke a mirror over her head, cutting her head open. thinking about all of what alex would do to her, this bdsm thing was light. amelia was tough and resilent, there would be no way this could break her. tending to her wounds would be fine. just pray they would snap a bone. swallowing her thoughts and got up from her mirror, millie slid her make up in it's bag and slid into some heels and put a bunch of clothes in a bag to head out to the studio. what was even happening? was this studio going to trap her? she was taking it, it was her job. being a porn actress wasn't so bad until it was and she never wanted to work. paying off her mother's debt and helping her dad get the farm in florida like he had always wanted. suck it up, you can do this.